While sociopaths make up 4% of the population, their impact can be far-reaching and devastating. Stout describes sociopaths as charming, intelligent, and often successful individuals. They are also manipulative, callous, and lack empathy. And yet, many of them can fly under the radar due to their ability to charm and deceive those around them.

Have you ever watched a show or documentary about anything where someone was taken advantage of by someone else and left to deal with the consequences? You sit there and think, what an idiot, how could you not see that coming? It's so easy to do that with other people's lives. One thing I have learned, when you are in a situation, you cannot see things as clearly as someone else might.

The book includes real-life examples of sociopaths in action, which I always find helpful. She also provides advice on how to protect yourself from their manipulations. One important thing to understand, you can never win with any of these personality types. If you are in a situation where you must deal with a sociopath, remember the critical rule: don't engage.

That sounds simple, but it's pretty hard to practice when living it. It takes time, but the more you learn not to be reactive, the easier your life will be.

Sometimes you cannot avoid interactions with someone you believe to be a sociopath. In that case, minimize the interactions as much as you can, and give them nothing they can use. There is no advantage in arguing, reasoning, negotiating, threatening, or bantering with a sociopath – it will only result in further manipulation.

Sociopaths love to manipulate and control people; to them, it's a game. So, they live for your reactions and emotions. They love to dominate you and enjoy your helplessness. They love if they caused something terrible to happen in your life, to see you fall apart, it's entertainment to them, something any empathic person finds hard to understand. In this case, you have to block your feelings, don't try to understand the why; know it's happening and do something about it.

So, what's the trick? How do you deal with them if you can't get them entirely out of your life? You become a rock. You become the most boring person on the planet. No reactions, either positively or negatively – you don't give them anything. After some time doing this, they will try to up their game to get some reaction out of you. Again, stay neutral; eventually, they will get bored with you and move on to find their next target.

Of course, that is easier said than done, but you are halfway there in recognizing what they are doing and starting your journey to be boring. Educate yourself; there are many books out there from academia, as well as people writing about their experiences. Knowledge is power; the more you know, the more you can read people, and the better off you will be.

Another interesting book I read was “The Empathy Trap” by Tim & Jane McGregor. Here we have another triad – the Sociopath-Empath-Apath Triad.

The Sociopath-Empath-Apath Triad describes the psychological abuse by sociopaths and how it plays out. They use one or more apaths as pawns in triangulation to target the empathic person. I've seen this play out in one of my previous jobs, but I didn't click what it was until I read this book. It's mad that when you have a name for something, you seem to understand it more.

Through manipulation, lies, and all the usual tricks, they turn people around the empath against them. Generally, this is because the first person to figure out the sociopath is an empath. Once an empath gets past believing everyone is good, they can figure out quite quickly what the sociopath is doing. Now in saying that, it's not always the case, don't believe you will be able to spot all of them quickly. But, mostly you should figure them out before other people.

The main aim of this triangulation is usually to neutralize the empath so they can do whatever they want, and the apaths will always go along with it. At that point, the empath has no support system, and people won't believe what they say. I found the book very interesting and included real-life scenarios, which always help you grasp the concept a little easier.

I often wonder why we don't learn about things like this in high school. They don't teach you personal finances, how to balance a checkbook, or about antisocial behavior, two things that would help you out in life. You only delve into the topic when you've been traumatized by someone.